3 Signs It's Time for Couples Therapy

Couples Counsellingemotionally focused couples therapy

Oct 6

Inspired by Emotionally Focused Therapy, the Work of Dr. Sue Johnson

Love is not a mystery. It’s a bond, biologically wired into us, rooted in our deepest need for connection. When that bond feels threatened or distant, we don’t just feel frustrated or irritated, we feel alone. Abandoned. Unsafe.

As couples drift apart, they often find themselves locked in patterns that feel impossible to break. But there is hope. Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy (EFCT) is built on the science of attachment, how we connect, disconnect, and find each other again.

So how do you know it’s time to reach out for help? Here are 3 key signs that your relationship may be crying out for couples therapy.

1. You’re Stuck in the Same Arguments Over and Over

You know the script: One partner criticizes, the other shuts down. Or maybe both of you escalate, voices rise, and everything ends in silence or slammed doors.

These are not just fights about chores or money or who said what last weekend. These repetitive arguments are protest cries. One of you is asking: Do I matter to you? Can I count on you? The other may be hearing judgment or rejection and pulling away to protect themselves.

Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy (EFCT) helps couples move past the content of the fight and into the emotions underneath. It helps you slow the dance and hear the longing beneath the anger. This is the beginning of healing.

2. You Feel More Like Roommates Than Lovers

You’re polite. You share responsibilities. Maybe you even laugh now and then. But something essential is missing: emotional closeness.

When the connection frays, affection and intimacy often go with it. Conversations become transactional. Touch becomes rare. Sex may feel like a chore, or disappear entirely.

This emotional distance doesn’t mean the love is gone. It means the bond is wounded. With Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy (EFCT), couples learn how to rebuild emotional safety, how to reach for each other again with openness and trust. It’s not about fixing your partner. It’s about finding your way back to each other.

3. You Avoid Vulnerability Because It No Longer Feels Safe

At some point, you stopped sharing what you really feel. Maybe it was after a betrayal. Maybe it was subtle, years of unmet needs or misunderstood emotions. But now, you hold back. You protect your heart.

Without vulnerability, love cannot thrive. It is in our openness that we invite closeness.

If you’ve started to feel that it’s not safe to be fully seen, or if attempts to connect are met with defensiveness or distance, it’s time to seek help. Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy helps partners relearn how to be emotionally responsive to each other. That responsiveness is the heartbeat of secure love.

The Takeaway: You Don’t Have to Do This Alone

Relationships aren’t supposed to be perfect. But they are supposed to feel like home.

If you're feeling stuck, disconnected, or afraid of losing the bond you once shared, reaching out for couples therapy is not a sign of failure, it’s an act of courage. It says: Our love matters enough to fight for.

In Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy (EFCT), we don’t just teach skills, we help couples feel their way back to each other. Because when we feel safe, we can soften. We can be honest. We can love, and be loved, as we truly are.

You’re not broken. Your bond is just hurting. And with the right support, healing is not only possible, it’s powerful.

Ready to Begin the Journey Back to Each Other?

If any of these signs resonate with you, I invite you to take the next step.

At Canopy Cove Counselling, our team of therapists offer Emotionally Focused Therapy, both in-person and online, to help individuals, couples rand families reconnect, repair, and rediscover the love that brought them together.

Schedule a free 15-minute consultation to see if Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy (EFCT)is right for you and your partner.

Let’s rebuild the bond. Together.

Schedule a Free Consultation

See other posts about Couples Counselling in Olds, Alberta:

Couples CounsellingEmotionally Focused Couples Therapy (EFT)

Canopy Cove Counselling

Canopy Cove Counselling offers Individual, Couple & Family Counselling in Olds, Alberta, offering support and whole family care with mental health, trauma and relationship challenges.